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Benom: Frazer and I were lucky enough to see Morrissey perform at the Star Plaza Theater in Indiana on Saturday, and all I can say is that it was worth every second spent in the car driving to and from Chicago to Merrillville. Luckily, Frazer lives out there so we had a nice comfortable locale for pre-show beverages.

Frazer: To say I was shocked to see Morrissey was playing about 3 miles from my kitchen is an understatement. I was sure to get confirmation from two or more publications that it was true before inviting Benom to visit Indiana for such an endeavor.

We figured that since the show purportedly started at 8pm that we would be there by 9 so we could be certain to miss the presumably bad first act/anti-tainment. On arrival, however, we found that we had not only missed the opening band, but Morrissey had already taken the stage…

Walking through the lobby adorned with posters of previously performing stars such as Tom Jones and David Copperfield, I could hear him singing a song I could recognize, but unfortunately, the aforementioned pre-show beverages have burned off any memory of what song it was. That song was to be the second to last song I recognized that night.

Benom: If memory serves, the song was “Tomorrow,” and I’m kind of pissed that we missed it, because as Frazer alluded to, there wasn’t a whole ton of classic Morrissey to hear that night. To say that he played a lot of new stuff would be an understatement, but he also played more Smiths songs than I thought he would, which was definitely a plus. The highlights for me include, in no particular order:

1) The “How Soon is Now” closer, during which countless lovers of Morrissey stormed the stage only to be rejected back into the crowd by one of three humongous stage guarding bouncer dudes.

2) The ripping off of sweaty shirt number one and donation of said shirt to one lucky audience member.

3) The ripping off of sweaty shirt number two (which said “Je Suis Morrissey” on the front) and donation of said shirt to another lucky audience member.

4) The Morrissey fan sitting, or rather, dancing two rows in front of us. I swear to golly he did not stop moving the entire show.

5) Morrissey’s back-up band, which was made up entirely of young, supple men in tight, matching outfits. Please note that all of their shirts remained on and intact (at least during the show).

Lowlights include the omission of the following songs from the set list, again in no particular order: “The More You Ignore Me,” “You’re the One for Me, Fatty,” “Interesting Drug,” “Everyday is Like Sunday,” “Piccadilly Palare,” “Glamorous Glue,” “We Hate It When Our Friends Become Successful,” “You’re Gonna Need Someone On Your Side,” “Suedehead,” and “Hairdresser On Fire.”

Frazer: And we mustn’t forget to mention a third shirt. Yes, there was a third wardrobe change but this was actually a previously unmentioned shirt which did not find it’s way into the audience. Morrissey was wearing a black button-up dress shirt which he inexplicably changed in favor of wearing an immediately sweat-soaked nipple area white button-up dress shirt. Instantly the circles formed at his nipples and slowly grew into what looked like full breasts. It was hypnotic. Like a second set of eyes. This is the one which he would quite literally rip off later to expose where his sweat is made.

Morrissey naked torso checklist:

Flab….. check
Translucent whiteness….. check
Absence of hair….. check
Squeal eliciting by girls and boys of all ages….. double check

See? There’s more than porn in Indiana. Just barely.

Overall I thoroughly enjoyed the show on many levels. Although I hadn’t heard nearly any of the songs, they all do sound like Morrissey. Which is a good thing for me. I also have to give him props on his live singing. He never missed a beat or hit a bad note even while warding off a sure-fire rape by an adoring fan. “How Soon is Now” was definitely a highlight and somewhat of a surprise. I’d also like to note one of Morrissey’s strengths is his awesome ability to whip his microphone cord around in time with the musical crescendos. Bravo Morrissey, and bravo to Benom for making the trek.

Benom: I have to agree. Morrissey has been a long time inhabitant of my “list of bands to see before I die,” so it was nice to be able to cross him off the list (yes, there’s actually a list) and not be let down. It was also nice to revisit my Morrissey/Smiths collection and listen to something other than In Rainbows for the first time in a few weeks. So thanks for that big guy.

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